We spent all of last year discussing the rights of our mothers in the explanation to al-Adab al-Mufrad (which we hope to re-start in about a months time).

This is a nice reminder though on the same topic. Submitted by Zakariya Goga, jazahullahu khayr.


Mothers Day

During the mid 18th century “Mothering Sunday” was the traditional day of the week specifically set aside to honour the mother for her duties to the family in England. Following the industrial revolution this custom was deserted due to the very nature of capitalism which by extension pre-occupies one’s psyche with the self. It was not until 1915 that this “Mother’s Day” was made an international holiday through the fortitude of Anne Jarvis (USA), who endeavoured to establish a set day in the year to commemorate mothers worldwide following the death of her own beloved mother.

Again, it is that time of the year. The whole world honours the mother - for 24 hours – and that is it.

I am obliged to write this short article following my reflections on the recent birth of my child and the endeavour of his mother in looking after him along with the rest of the house; a phenomenon I admit to my own limitations in simply changing a nappy.

Our pristine religion called for this celebration of our mothers as being a necessary action, intrinsic in the nature of parenthood, and in particular with regards to the mother. It comes as no surprise now, at the myriad of familiar verses of the Qur’an and Hadith in indication of this honour, and certainly not the least unexpected that Imam al-Bukhari’s first chapter in his great work al-Adab al-Mufrad began with the chapter on Motherhood.

It is exceptionally difficult to appreciate the state of pregnancy/labour unless one is in that state. Nine months of first hand experience travelling through this emotional and physical rollercoaster as my wife’s “pregnancy/birthing partner” resulted in myself immediately and profusely apologising to my mother for each time I have simply distressed her; and that was the least.

The sleepless nights, washing of defecation, feeding on demand, disruption of personal life, stress at the thought of the immunisation process, concern over a snuffly nose or a graze, constant pursuit of keeping warm, gifts, toys, silly faces and embarrassing songs – the list is endless. And all of the above mentioned is only for the first 6 months of life.

So now each time I witness my son’s nappy being changed or the sound of baby songs at 3am, a tear finds it’s way on my cheek, and the du'a “Rabb-irham huma kama rabbayaani saghira” (“Oh my Lord, show mercy of them as they did when I was small”) is moist on my tongue.

Remember the words of ibn ‘Abbas, which is a reflection of all the verses of the Qur’an and Hadith of the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, “I do not know any action that will bring one closer to Allah than showing kindness to the mother” [Adab-al-Mufrad]

Smile often, plant kisses on her forehead, embrace her each time you meet, once a week make breakfast in bed, and shower her with flowers, scent, delicatessens regularly – as it is the regular actions that embed in the hearts real affection or abhorrence between two parties.